Saturday, October 26, 2019

What is my goal?

Well, I've been on LBRY for just a few months now and I'm already commonly highly placed on Trending.

In just a few months, with very limited exposure to people, I've made about $23CAD of cryptocurrency from the platform.

That is a sign of hopefully continuing economic success from these efforts.



But what is it all for? Why am I doing it?



In the beginning of this whole adventure of me trying to do something with my life:::: my idea was that I was going to work for Jesus, from a Mormon/LDS way.

But back then my knowledge of the Mormon/LDS ways was heavily limited, especially because I've never been to the temple or got my endowment.


I basically set out to serve Mormon Jesus -------- and learned as I went along, and found some things to be very messed up.



So:::: I've done what I've done, I've had all this experience, I'm suddenly having some kind of success --------



but now I'm wondering ---- What is it all for?


My end goal is not the same now as when I started out.



I started out planning to do certain things with my life:::: but as I found more information, my plans have to change ------


And I just have to figure out exactly what it is I'm going for with my new found success.



$23 isn't much, but it's the biggest gains I've made for a long time. I'm highly placed on trending.



I could do something with this status ------ it should be something good, or useful, at least entertaining.



It's just weird how I started this whole "business" with serving Mormon Jesus in mind only to figure out that this is not how I should be.


What should my end goal be?



Maybe I just have to just hope to entertain people. Maybe I need to set my end goal at a humbler level than before.


To entertain people with guitar and video games? To try to teach people something useful with these medias? Hmmmm.


I need to figure out a worthwhile end goal. My former end goal is not suitable anymore.



I mean::: I should be doing something with my life, it would be a great waste to do nothing.


But it's a good idea to have something to work towards. yeah.



UPDATE:::::


I was just thinking about things that are good that I might try to teach people in LBRY videos.


And I realized something relevant to this post that I should make an update about.


Mormonism is actually full of wisdom.


Mormonism actually teaches many good things.


There are things about the church or the history of the church which are pretty much very wrong,


But when I think about wise things I might impart to others in videos,


I have a realization that many of these good ideas were also taught in the Mormon church.


Mormonism became so wrong somehow --------- but so many good ideas were expressed in that group.


Weird stuff.


Here's a runthrough of some of the good things Mormons taught::

1) Give. Do service. This is good stuff.

2) Don't have sex. I know a lot of people completely miss the point of this one::: but it's a good point::: just don't have sex.

3) The world we live in cannot be expected to be perfect. Basically, the Mormons believe we live in a telestial world, or a very low level world ----- so don't expect people to be on their best behavior.

4) Despite how the world around us is so wrong, it's up to YOU to be perfect/do your best. Let your light shine.



I mean::::: in so many ways the church just becomes so wrong,


but there are things they taught which were really, really good to know.


So:::: it's hard for me to tell if I should distance myself from Mormon Jesus or go back to Mormon Jesus.


The church is really a mised bag. There's the good and the bad.


Sometimes the bad is very noticeable -------

but when I think about all these wise things I know ------- the Mormon church already beat me to the punch, so to speak.


Who knows.

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