It used to be that every year, on my birthday or thereabouts, someone from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints would come along to greet me for my birthday.
Every year. Without fail. A birthday greeting from the church.
But for the past 2 years ------ no birthday greetings from the church, they don't even talk to me anymore (except for a family friend who invited me to conference).
I got birthday greetings from my mental illness clubhouse both years ---- but nothing from the church.
I wrote an email to some psychiatric friends mentioning this ----- and I thought I knew the reason ------ I had a theory ------- turned out I was wrong.
My theory involved me asking the church a really hard question that they couldn't answer and then they just give up on me.
And though it's true that I actually do have a really hard question on my mind that I have no answer from the church for ------ when I looked at my email records, I hadn't actually asked this question to the church. Unless I didn't look far enough back.
I checked my last two emails to the Church Bishop.
Maybe I asked the question in an earlier email and never got an answer. Maybe not though.
But:::: I did send two last messages within days of each other, and the Bishop did respond to one of them (it was a kind email, nothing really wrong with it, it was basically his validation that he received my message and he understands).
So::::: What were my last two messages that the church received that the Bishop actually understood now about?
I had all kinds of amazing things happening in my life, socially in the world, especially due to my books and video games, and I told him about some of these things in my last two emails.
He responded basically giving his nod of understanding.
And then the church never talked to me again, except for a family friend.
So::::: There was this history of the church trying to control my life for years telling me I'm not allowed to be friends with Avril Lavigne ----------
And what those last two emails said about my experiences said I really did make some breakthroughs in the world ----------
And the Bishop just had to accept, I'm guessing, that past leadership was wrong in their control tactics and that the church had been misled.
I'm guessing that's why they stopped talking to me:::: because they realize I don't trust them anymore.
They were so freaking seriously trying to control me to not be friends with Avril ---------- but to be honest that was actually completely contrary to what the Holy Ghost actually inspired me to do------
So the Holy Ghost spoke to me and the Church went against it ---------
And years later I've got all this stuff going on after having followed the Holy Ghost and ignoring the church ------------
having told the bishop about it --------- he must've realized the church was wrong for me, and then all contact was lost.
I have realized a new question that I would want to ask to the church (m parents are never any help on these doctrinal issues) ------- but it's touchy enough subject matter I guess I might as well not explain it on my blog.