Monday, August 5, 2019

My Mental Health

Today my Dad asked me to do something which required me to use a password I almost never use.

I did, in fact, remember the obscure and unused password and got it right on the first try. That's the good news about my mental health today.

Years ago when I was not doing too well, the above would have been likely impossible ---- I was once an ace math student, but during a period in my life, simple math calculations in my head became either very difficult or impossible. I really did have problems.

So, I've obviously recovered somewhat if I'm able to remember a never-used obscure password on the first try. Yay.



But emotionally today is a different story.


Today I feel heartbroken.


I literally feel like my heart has broken, that emotional pain kind of like I felt so long ago.


I'm guessing it must be empathy of someone else's pain. That's my best guess.



Also, in the past few weeks when my Mom has visited the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints' temple she has come home not being happy twice now.


The second time I also felt some severe emotional discomfort connected with her arriving home -- again as if it were empathy.


I swear, there must be something spiritual about the human psyche and emotions ----- feeling another person's pain must be spiritual somehow I'm guessing.


So::::: My Mom is having her ups and downs lately, the downs are coming in connection to thoughts of the church and as she's coming home from the temple.


I wondered if she'll be having a faith crisis too. I don't know. The emotions aren't right anymore, however, I can tell that much.



And I still feel heartbroken.



It's just a sad, sad day I guess.

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