Thursday, September 13, 2018

Programming and Thinking

My Dad said there was only one other time in his life history where he was programming in BASIC --- many years ago at his job.

Now, for his hobby, he's doing BASIC again.

It's nice to see him working at that sort of thing again.

During my childhood, I remember seeing and watching him do much work on the family computer in a language called "Prograph". Prograph doesn't exist anymore, and I tried to learn it but didn't grasp it, but my Dad somehow understood it, and actually published a project with it.

Of course, that project didn't pay him very much, so we ended up being what I thought of as poor.




I was remembering when I was first trying to teach myself JAVA before I became schizophrenic ---- Yes ---- trying to learn JAVA at that time might have been an early indicator that my brain was going to have problems, because some of the concepts of the language were somehow too abstract for my brain back then, and I was just beginning to start to shut down at that time, as I remember.

Of course, having done OUYA many years later, suddenly JAVA is so much more understandable --- and maybe I was just having a brain shutdown and a reboot or something.



In the HALO universe by Bungie, I think I remember reading in one of the books that the Human AI's had a problem where they would "think themselves to death".


I'm kind of wondering now, at this point in my life if I'm going to have a similar problem::: My brain has learned so much information and experience over the years, that often my brain is processing very quickly and there's too much information and not enough brain power ---- and I wonder if I'm just going to wear my brain out with all the thoughts I have.

Maybe it's just mental exercise, but I've had so much to think about in just 34 years ---- the information amount seems immense and my brain hardly gets any rest.  And that's just thinking about the PAST ------ I feel very worn out and wondering how effective I can be at figuring out current and future problems -------- maybe like an absent-minded professor of sorts.





And the final thing I'll mention in this post is this::::


What is the explanation for why my left eye would become partially sighted?

There are possible "scientific" explanations:

such as

1) Possibly it's genetics, one of my uncles is blind in one eye.

2) Possibly it might a problem with how I sleep, but that can't totally be helped because I'm a very big person, and I'm very big because of my psychiatric drug ---- and nobody is going to change that.

3) Possibly it might come from a problem involving how I got my dental implant MAYBE.




And then, there's the "magical" world, where the Law of Attraction will make you sick or ill simply because you haven't been loving enough.


SO:::: Did my left eye get pooched because I have too much animosity in my thinking processes?


I might even have legitimate reasons for my animosity ----- but try as I might to bless the whole world especially everyone who ever wronged me ------- I can still feel and think conrary to a number of problems I've seen or experienced in my life ------ and I have to wonder if any of my contrarian thinking, like for example, thinking about Mormon problems, might somehow have caused tme to be less loving than I should be and thus my eyesight gets pooched?



Am I just growing old?



But that's really something to think about you know ---- how important love is.


The Law of Attraction will do bad things to you if you don't have enough love in your life.



So::::: what if you are supposed to be so loving of everyone, regardless of how messed up they might've been to you? I don't know ------


or what if, for some reason, God actually is with the Mormons even if that doesn't totally make total sense all the time???



So::: yeah, potential scientific explanations for my eyes ----- and then the magical reasoning.


Overworking my brain to the point of shutdown maybe?


and it's just nice and nostalgic kind of for me to see my Dad working a programming language again.






OUYA once asked a question on Mother's Day in a tweet along the lines of "How did your Mom inspire or help you to become a programmer?"


I never responded, but I definitely thought I could have said: "She married my Dad, who was working with computers in various ways since the early days".


Anyway, yeah, that's today's update.

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