On the topic of how messed up the reward system is (in relation to the dopamine eff up):
Another problem is that the LDS church I grew up in was constantly indoctrinating us on the value of "service" work, which is essentially doing a bunch of hard labour for no money. It was technically slavery ---- but yeah, we were told to feel good about working without reward, and then they would tell us to give them 10% of our incomes. Something is really messed up about that.
And I try working on books and video games, and though this is legitimately considered to be work in my mind, somehow, in the Mormon tradition, I'm not getting paid for it.
What I am happy about though --- and this is a final resort option I guess, and is technically not the way we should be running an economy but is the way it's turning out because of how hard it is to get paid for actual work --- is this "binary trading" thing.
A bunch of blog posts ago I posted about my experience making 50% on binary trading investment in one day, and then losing it all very quickly.
I tried the binary trading thing again. I turned $10 into a few hundred dollars, and withdrew most of that money, except I tried trading some more and lost the remainder.
It's very easy to make a big profit in binary trading, but it's also very easy to lose everything. It's pretty much 50/50 chances each time you do it. I can be very profitable, or a lose all total investment situation. I got a bit lucky a couple weeks ago.
And I bought a hat. My old hat was getting sweat-stained and oily and I didn't totally like it anymore, as well as a hint from my Mom that it was time for a new hat.
So I was happy to go to a store today where I found a nice new hat that was totally better than the last one.
This new hat cost $120.
Realize, how good I feel about how I could afford to buy and own and now wear this hat. It feel good, I'm happy with the situation.
But before in life, it didn't matter how hard I worked on anything I did --- church expected me to work for free while paying tithing, my parents couldn't afford crap --- didn't matter how hard I tried, the best I could expect in life back then was the $50 for birthday and Christmas from my grandparents.
And yes, I did actually buy a cheap-cheap-fedora back then, which got ruined by the rain very quickly, and that cheap cheap fedora practically took up all my spending money.
So really, I could never have afforded a $120 hat as a kid, and that would've been a blow to my psyche --- and the hat I did buy took up all my spending money and ended up being a cheap piece of crap anyway.
So yeah, I had a dopamine fuck up. Didn't matter how hard I tried as I kid, I would never have gotten the kind of hat I have now.
And yes, this is a broad-brimmed hat, and is way better than a fedora. Fedoras seem cool because Indiana Jones wore one ----- but I'd say that this hat I got today is like so much better than a felt fedora. So much better. And it's at least twice the price of a fedora too. :)
Anyway, yeah, just a bit more on the dopamine fuck up. And using my new hat as an analogy, the hat makes me feel good to have, and I could never have such a thing as a kid no matter how hard I tried.
PS ----- I've also previously noted that I don't get paid the smallest price for actual work I do, while I was constantly running into people on the street asking for pretty much free handouts for quite a while in the past years.
If I suddenly have success with binary trading and have some money for myself that way --- leave me the fuck alone, go binary trade yourself your way to your own fortune. Using IQ Option, it wasn't too hard to go from $10 to a few hundred dollars in just an hour or two.