Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Mental Illness: Nature or Nurture?

The title of this blog post is slightly deceptive because it's only a beginning to what I want to discuss, not the actual total subject of what I want to discuss.

So, is Mental Illness Nature or Nurture? I'm going to say it's easily both, especially at the same time.

why?

Well, my family just seems to have those genetics for mental illness ---- everything going completely crazy through the house, usually because someone's not thinking properly.

But even if  you have a guy like me, who is mostly capable of thinking well, being around a crazy family all the time is enough to drive even the good thinkers to madness --- especially with the genetic pre-disposition.

I deserve my AiSH, I guess. I just happen to live in that family that has serious mental issues. I may have been the smartest in school, but I lost that completely because of the absolute crap in the environment I've had to live in.

I'm saying this because of something I just discussed with my mom and dad:

I told my parents about the news that even if the Conservatives got a Minority government with the most seats, that the other parties are already planning on not allowing Harper to become Prime Minister. This is actually an option as I have understood.

Well, when I told my dad about the "other option" for a non-confidence vote where the Governor General can declare the leader of the opposition to be the new Prime Minister, my dad said "Governor General needs to go...." and something else that was so inappropriate that I won't even post it here.

He complained that the other parties have no sense and if they take control then Canada isn't Canada anymore, that it's not his country, and from his behaviour I could tell it would be another 5 years of whining and complaining from my father about how much he hates the government ---- I mean, when Jean Chretien was Prime Minister I was partially driven insane just by hearing about how bad a man my dad thinks the Prime Minister was.

Anyway, my dad said that the leftist parties were socialist (he considers Trudeau and his father to actually be communists, as I've understood) and that if the socialists were to control the country then that's the end of democracy in Canada.

????

I had to tell my Dad that socialism is technically a democratic movement and my Mom told him there's no point in being so upset - that whatever will be will be.


Anyway, it's interesting how my dad could consider the voice of the people to be undemocratric just because of the chosen ideology being different from his, which means he's actually interested in his party being in control regardless of the vote and seeing as how he's right wing that technically makes him a fascist.

Wait a second ---- I thought my dad hated Fascists.


He wants conservatives to control the government because if the people elected leftists that would be "undemocratic". I'm really confused.


Anyway, growing up I was told that I had to love and obey and honour my father, which I did, up until I was 17 when I realized my dad was actually completely insane and also completely wrong in a number of the things he said.



Basically, once I tell my Dad about some things that happen in that crazy church, he notices that its hypocrisy, but when I look at my dad's statements choices and behaviours I also realize that he too is a hypocrite.


In fact, my Dad just doesn't have a reasonable understanding of some definitions, doctrines, or issues.




Let's just say, my Dad was the kind of guy who would fail english class twice, only to eventually pass it with a 60% grade.

I, though I hated english class, was A LOT smarter than that.



It's tough, being placed under the supervision and authority of a person who is actually dumber than yourself.

I mean, I was a high 70s to 80s percent kind of guy in English class, and I never failed.  My dad just barely squeaked through those classes.


Like, in my discussions of religion with him ---- some concepts he understands, but other concepts are completely beyond his comprehension. In fact, I have no clue exactly what he thinks or what he thought he believed anymore. It wasn't totally based on actual Mormonism, but it wasn't totally based on actual Christianity either. No clue.


Basically, I'm mentally ill, I've had to grow up with a father who can't appear to work for a living but totally supports capitalism. Like that made sense somehow.

Yes --- I think I deserve my AiSH, I've got a crazy family, and even if I were the smartest I could be (which I was) --- a completely crappy and nonsensical environment drove me to madness.


Understand why I get my disability. OK? :)

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