So, the day after my post before this one, I was visited by an old LDS friend.
She bore gifts.
It's very hard to argue with that much kindness.
I practically forgot a lot of problems for quite a while, and I'm still in a very good mood about my old friends show of kindness and sympathy.
If the LDS church is the devil's church -- then I can only suppose that all the nice and kind behavior is just part of the deception-
but it's very difficult to argue with that nice and kind behavior.
I am in a very good mood, and for a long time I attributed a level of satisfaction with what the LDS church could be or trying to achieve.
Since, I've remembered parts of the LDS disaster (the church does seem like a big disaster in my life), balanced that with the miraculous things I learned in the church, and realized that every individual is different, and that my friend who gifted me was doing so from her own free will which may have been influenced by the church.
Yes- I'm still in a good mood, I'm not thinking the sad thoughts I usually have about mormonism.
Basically:: the kindness of this individual has lifted me out of my pit of begrudging anguish, and I'm in a good mood, and it's hard to stay mad at the church after that.
But --- I do remember that some people in the church are contrary to me rather than friendly, and that counter-balances whatever desire I may have had to return to church.
Besides, I might never fully reactivate in mormonism with all my coffee drinking and my seeming inability to calm down my hormones, or those demons, or whatever the case may be.
Anyway --- just sayin' I'm still in a good mood about the church, and it's largely because someone was being very friendly towards me.
The Amazing Kreskin teaches that hypnosis works through the power of suggestion. Through a suggestion, you can feel happy and uplifted as my friend recently did to me, and I even imagine that through suggestion you can even feel grumpy or angry or hurt.
I'm saying this because I was taught in church that "no one can make you angry, you control your attitude", being taught that no one else has any power over your emotions, essentially.
I would say that this teaching from church is actually a false teaching. Hypnosis is powerful::: the suggestion of someone's behavior on your mind could create good or bad feelings, I think.
The church teacher was basically saying "people can be dicks all the time but you shouldn't respond to that because you are perfectly capable of controlling your emotions and not letting it get you down".
I would say that teaching might be true for SOME people, but for others it is not true. The power of suggestion may influence your emotional state.
I remember, especially in grade 12 -- that I was very easily driven to tears, and I had a very hard time controlling some of my emotions.
And as for the angry outbursts::: after the way I was treated by the angry and dishonest Liabilitys, and the Liabilitys were forgiven for their behavior, I would have thought that my anger would be let off the hook too. Nope -- it was the case of a double standard, where one Mormon family gets to be as abominable as they want and be let off the hook while if I was anything similar I would be punished for it.
That's another reason why I'm not sure I'd really return to mormonism.
But all in all, I'm in a much better mood, I don't have all kinds of negative thoughts about the church, and the tangent I went on in this blog post was the most negative my thinking about the church has been all day.