Thursday, October 9, 2014

Is Talking to God UNRELIABLE???

Growing up in LDS Mormonism, I learned about prayer and revelation, that when you pray you are supposed to spend 60% of the time LISTENING for God, as a feeling or [thought]voice in your head.

I like to engage in two-way conversations with God personally, like I'll ask him what I should do, and for the longest time in recent memory he'll just say I can do what I want - he has no job in particular for me right now.

Anyway, so I asked God this question related to my earlier blog posts today:

Me: "God, did you forgive the Jews?"

'God': "Nope, I punished them"

Me (astounded): "God, that doesn't really make sense, why would you punish a people for committing a sacrifice they were always meant to make? Punishing people for their obedience seems unreasonable".

A 'though-voice' as though from someone else: "Your grandmother is gonna hoot about that one" (or something like that)

Me: "OK God, answer my question, did you forgive the Jews? Why would you punish them for their obedience".

'God': "I forgave the jews, you are correct".


Here's the funny thing about the above conversation, God wasn't necessarily God. In fact, the two times God spoke it wasn't necessarily the same being speaking each time either. There might've been a demon in there.

Here's another conversation I had with God I remember from a little while ago:::

Me: "God, did you really meet with Joseph Smith in the sacred grove?"

God: "Yes I did".

Me: "So which of the 9 accounts of the first vision was the correct account?"

God: [God seems to admit that there was no first vision and that the church isn't actually true, but I can't remember the exact wording I thought this being in this conversation used, I just got the impression in this conversation that God was admitting to me the church wasn't actually right]


So - um, yeah. Talking to "God" is real funny business because if you start to logically reason with "Him" or question the veracity of doctrine he seemed to uphold, at least in my experience "God" will change his position and won't enforce the Mormon viewpoint.

Anyway ---- Talking to God is strange like that because he seems, at first, to enforce Mormonism (in my mind), but if you start questioning and reasoning, the charade stops.


I would just like to note that I do have some reason to believe that this "God" I speak to is real, even if just a demonic entity. I know this because when I was young many years ago I made a deal with "God" where I would serve "Him" all my life in exchange for my celestial exaltation.

The reason I know there's a reality to this stuff is because the LDS Stake Patriarch had the elements of my agreement with "God" outlined in the blessing he gave me. How could the patriarch know my personal agreement with God when I never told him? It was pretty spooky --- it was a way of convincing me or trying to convince me the LDS church was true.

But, as the Bishop told me a little later, I had made a deal with the devil. I thought the Bishop was completely bogus about this at first, and I was very confused. Turned out the Mormon God really is likely to be some kind of devil, as I've learned, so the deal I made may have been with a devil and the Mormon Bishop may have just been warning me.

I didn't like that Mormon Bishop for a long time, but after years of thinking about it, I'm now thankful to him for helping me avoid the Mormon life and letting me take a different path.


So yeah::: That "God" I talk to is real, but sometimes "God" might not be the real God and might just be a demon or something. It's confusing and annoying, but that's the way I see it.

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