Thursday, October 23, 2014

Being a reasonably obedient mormon but finding there's too much control in the church.

Today I just remembered some things from my life, and I guess I should post these memories here, so you too, whoever you are, can also know.

When I grew up in Mormonism, I took my baptismal covenant seriously. I actually wanted and tried to obey and be part of the religion.

One thing I did with my Mormonism is I kept the Sabbath Day Holy.

That meant Sunday is not a work day. Sunday is a day of rest.

So, I did my homework on friday night or saturday, and Sunday was my day off. I actually followed that rule.

So, one sunday, I've got nothing to do, and I feel like relaxing a bit and enjoying a videogame. I loved videogames.

So, on my day of rest, a Sunday, I started playing a game on my computer.

Lo and behold, my Mom starts screaming at me to turn off the computer. It's like, apparently totally unlawful to enjoy your day of rest by playing videogames.

Especially when your sisters are doing their homework.

Yup ---- My mom treated me like I was wrong to rest on sunday and enjoy a videogame while she wanted to let my sisters do their homework on their holy day.

Compute in how church leaders are obsessive about making us obey our parents, and obviously I am going to be insane.

I mean -- I obeyed the rule, I didn't work on Sunday, yet for some reason a relaxing pass-time of playing videogames is also wrong on that day.

It was somehow right or OK for my sisters to do their schoolwork on that day while it was wrong for me to play a videogame. Apparently I was supposed to be reading my scriptures or something.

Which is strange, because every day is a scripture reading day in mormonism (note:: I practically aced seminary, I knew the ins and outs of the book of mormon like no other student), yet apparently Sunday is an especially important scripture reading day without any room for other things like videogames.

Blew my mind. My sisters are doing their homework, and they're allowed to do that, while I'm being screamed at to not play videogames.

When I mentioned this to my dad today, he said he and mom were just trying to do as they were told.

I remember that bishop::: the kind of bishop who won't even let you be friends with Avril Lavigne even though she sings about you and you are friends anyway.

Yup --- apparently it was so important to not play videogames and not be friends with Avril Lavigne that my mom, at one point, felt like getting rid of the internet connection.

And of course, I can probably safely assume the Bishop was behind it all, or at least someone at church.

Yes --- I grew up being sexually molested by demons (or maybe it was grandma) and being unable to avoid sex --- but this is the church that will just punish you and say "you should have resisted the demon harder", or, though your hormones really are beyond your own control, the church will condemn you for being what you are.


So, though I reasonably obeyed Mormonism by not doing my homework on sunday (and also being the top of the class in school), for some reason I had to be told to not play videogames on my day of rest or to not be friends with Avril Lavigne even as my sisters were encouraged to do their homework on the Holy Day.

Yes --- I am a completely freakin' mental case after that.

The church won't allow a fun passtime, won't allow friendshipping with someone who is absolutely amazing, will turn off the internet connection and then encourage the young ones to do their school work on the holy day.

What a church.

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