Friday, June 27, 2014

Bunch of Stuff - Maybe Repetitive

So, according to a helpful commenter on this blog, I have now realized that snazzy yellow car from the other day was a Porsche.

So::: I've got an expensive car with tourists nearby my house, Abbey Dawn Road is near my grandparents' place, when Avril befriended me on Facebook late last year the next day my father and I saw a couple pretty ladies waving at us as though they were somehow trying to be very friendly (which is unusual).


I have to say --- it is really nice to have a community out there that is at least somewhat interested, seemingly helping me through poor circumstances.

Of course, I'm trying to improve my circumstances, by trying to make some money on the internet selling books and video games. I'm not very good at dealing with stress, and I even feel a little disabled about the personal projects that I do work on.


When I was young, I'd want to sit down at the computer intending to play a video game. I just wanted to play the video game at the computer - I had no ill intention:: but for some reason as I'm booting my computer, for some reason I'd be consistently overcome by a sense of extreme sexual desire. I wasn't intending to do anything sexual:: but there was always some force acting on my mind practically forcing me to misbehave.


Well, as for trying to make some cash, yesterday I sat down at my computer with intentions to continue writing my sequel to The Eagle's Sore, I thought it would be nice if I got back to work on a project I got started on last year. Unfortunately, there just seems to be some kind of magical force that turns my brain off as I'm sitting at the computer -- a lot like there was some magical force causing me to be sexually driven.

Of course, today I sat down with Unity 3d and started playing around, seeing if I could develop another video game. I had no mental blockages this time, but my knowledge of how to use unity is at a very basic beginner level, so I didn't get very far.


Anyway ----- Now for my standard complaint::::: when I go to the local pizza place to buy a slice of hawaiian or pepperoni -- I'll pay my $4 for the slice and a drink, and then I'll drop the change I get (usually a loonie) into the tips jar.

I mean, it's no big deal to me to give that one dollar tip to that guy who helped me with a little bit of service.


But I give so much for free on the internet --- and most people can't seem to be bothered to pay that little one dollar tip for my work. I just ask for a small amount of money for the work I've done, and the vast majority of people can't be bothered to help me out.

It must mean I'm a horrible person or my product is just terrible and not worth using or something. There's just something so terribly wrong with me that it's offensive to give me a one dollar tip for my service, for my work.

Or it could be that most people on the internet or in western society are just too darned cheap.

Anyway --- I calculate that if everyone who downloaded my video games paid me the $2 I ask for and then also saw my ad and bought my novella, I'd pretty much be out of debt right now - or at least, if everyone who downloaded my book for free had actually paid for it or at least bought the sequel as well. I'm asking for just a few dollars from my various customers, and apparently that's too expensive. Sheesh.

I'd be out of debt right now in two ways: If people actually paid me for my work, or if I never made a single charitable donation in the past 4 years and didn't spend that money anywhere else. I give so much to charity that the charitable donations now account for my whole debt, but most people can't be bothered to pay a small fee or tip for the work I have done. Humph. I guess Life's not fair.

Maybe the whole world is just really-really poor and I'm just especially blessed to live in Oil-Rich Alberta.



As for my feelings about the LDS church:::: I STILL maintain my testimony of some kind of apparent magic in that organization, but it doesn't matter anymore because I'm so annoyed with the baloney that I did see that I don't care to bother with them. I've been ambivalent, perhaps still ambivalent, but I'm moving towards not going back, I'm thinking I don't care for these LDS people anymore. I don't need them. But it's true I thought I experienced something magical with them.

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