Monday, May 12, 2014

Awaiting a Personal Verdict on the LDS church

With all my paranormal experiences and Christ-sightings, I still have no perfect verification from any source about whether the LDS church is a true or the true church or not.

Part of my problem is I'm so scared and introverted that talking to any "divine manifestation" is difficult.

In my personal opinion, the LDS church is distasteful, there are things about it that I cannot respect or I find really hard to respect.

On the other hand, they have some good teachings and try to be good people, as well as there did seem to be a valid miraculous power about them.

No perfect indication if God/Jesus really accepts them as the true or right ones though.

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You know how Vaughn J Featherstone said the priesthood needs a pure conduit to operate in, and how in order to be pure you have to be following all those little rules?

My patriarchal blessing came from the priesthood, and opportunities my patriarchal blessing gives will only come to pass if I am faithful and worthy.

My patriarchal blessing said I would find my place among the children of men to earn a living for myself and my future family. What this means is that I'd have a job, or have some kind income, probably a job.

Am I to understand that I can't have a job because I drink coffee? I lost my ability to earn for my family because I drink coffee?

My patriarchal blessing says I'd be sealed to a companion of my choice.

Am I to understand that I can't get married because I buy lottery tickets?

My patriarchal blessing said I'd travel and preach to the nations.

Am I to understand that I can't travel and preach because I like rock/popular music?

My patriarchal blessing says I'd walk in the path of righteousness.

Am I to understand that I am unable to become totally righteous because I masturbate and have huge manly sexual urges sometimes?



Yeah - it sounds kind of like nonsense that where I go in life depends on my personal worthiness and faithfulness.

Does it make sense that I don't work for a living because I drink coffee and buy lottery tickets? I mean, technically whether or not I masturbate should have nothing to do with whether or not I work for a living or reproduce.

It doesn't really make sense - but that's what the LDS church would have me believe.


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UPDATE:

After writing the above post and eating some food, I went into my bedroom to go to bed, to think and sleep.

I was thinking about my blog post, essentially, why my patriarchal blessings couldn't or didn't come true, when I saw with direct vision a VERY BRIGHT or GLORIOUS figure of some sort, kind of a shorter figure, appear briefly, standing in the doorway of my bedroom.

I saw something bright and shiny, whitish-bluish in colour. I didn't think it was too tall, and I'm not quite sure exactly what or who it was, as I saw it only for a moment and I didn't get any clear features of the figure in my viewpoint.

Just know that I did see SOMETHING completely unnatural and abnormal just moments ago, and it definitely was not one of our house-lights. Definitely not a passing car either. Definitely something different.

The exact thoughts I was thinking were along the lines of "It's so strange how someone other than myself gets to decide who I do or don't marry, though it is supposed to be our own decision."

I'm supposed to be able to make my own choice about who I marry, but it appears that some 3rd party gets to make the final choice on my behalf. So strange.

I was thinking about how I am Avril Lavigne's sk8er boi because I wasn't good enough, but I couldn't marry her because I wasn't good enough. I then realized that that explanation doesn't make any sense and was not in fact the explanation used at the time - it was actually just because she's a bad musician that I couldn't be with her.

I actually have another reason that's not in The Book of Finch for why I couldn't be with her, but since that reason only appeared in my telepathy, and it is not physically verifiable at any point in history thus far, I do not repeat that reason.

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