Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Psychologically Distressed about the Church

Just thinking about LDS mormonism drives me to psychological distress, I can always find reasons to disparage them.

But then I realized::: If psychiatric drugs didn't have those negative side-effects, then the church really was trying to help me.

God, and the psychiatrist really helped me go from being suicidal to being ready and happy to live life.

The church is an imperfect organization, and I view them in such negative light so much of the time. They are obviously very imperfect, but maybe they are just trying to repent and help me through psychiatry.

I know, it doesn't make any sense at all, but if psychiatric drugs are actually trying to help me, despite the negative side effects, then I guess the church is trying to do something good. Sending me for a psychiatrist is like their way of repenting of all the belittling and abuse that I had to go through.

Of course, from a different perspective sending me to the psych docs is just more punishment and abuse, descended from punishment and abuse, but there is a positive aspect to it,

I'll just say that it is very easy for me to look at the LDS church negatively and to have a negative attitude about them ---

but I wrote this blog post as I realized that they were actually trying to repent and help me with the psychiatry.

It is, of course, all a very imperfect system, but at least I don't want to kill myself anymore and life is more bearable. Yay.

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