I recently lost any desire to be famous. But I still write in my blog anyway.
Earlier today I had some sort of angry outburst, I was swearing and cursing about the church, I almost made the mistake of sending a very bad letter to my stake president.
But then a feeling of calm and optimism overcame me. In my earlier blog post, I said there are reasons why I wouldn't go back to church, to remain in my hobbit-hole, but that I do have a testimony.
But now I am feeling such POWER --- and I'm feeling a sort of magnetic draw making me desire to return. I am under the influence of some kind of mormon-friendly force that is reassuring my testimony and it feels like I'm being drawn back to the church.
There are ALL KINDS of personal and historical reasons why the LDS church would not be true ---- but the fact remains that I have a very real personal witness of LDS magic, and I am now feeling the power and a force "magnetically" drawing me back to the church.
Maybe I'm still not in my right mind. But, if this feeling persists, then I'll go back eventually, somehow.
I mean, even though I am aware that coffee is a good healthy drink, and I am aware the church had a bad position about coffee for a very long time, it's like those problems don't matter anymore, it's like the church is true or has value despite all the horrible horrible flaws and mistakes.
I still intend on drinking coffee. But i just feel so forgiving to others and I feel such a force of power drawing me back to the church.
I just have to hope that my personality stops being so angry and abrasive. I do have real psychological issues.