So - what is my current position on LDS mormonism?
I just watched a couple of youtube videos, one from an ex-christian who decries christianity altogether, and one from an ex-mormon who decries mormonism but promotes christianity.
So - what is my take on mormonism, right now?
I can totally understand why a person would deny the LDS church. I have found many reasons myself to deny the church, and my belief in the organization did falter.
The church, seemingly however, led me on a path in life that gave me evidence of God and miracles. What can I say about that?
1. The LDS church is truly uplifted and uplifting based on a truth and/or reality about the organization
2. God loves me and he's babying my mind against the potentially hideous beast that is mormonism.
To me, there is enough evidence to suggest that the church is not completely fake --- but whether it is truly the church of God or if it's a creation of some nefarious being like Satan I haven't quite yet decided on, so you could say I'm ambivalent.
There does appear to be a reality to miracles and prophecy in the church to a certain extent, but from another angle, the church or church members and leaders teach some of the most unbelievable things - contradictions and hints of untruth abound.
So, it's possible that the church is true and that the members are extremely imperfect, or it's a devious and cunning deception created by satan designed to make us miserable --- and when you consider all the anti-depressant usage in utah, obviously it's not really making people happy, people tend to go into some form of chemical dependancy when they belong to the LDS church.
So, yeah, I'm ambivalent about mormonism, I see it has some good things about it, but I also find it questionable.
To tell the truth, I feel better about giving tonnes of money to my father or a couple good charities than I do about paying tithing --- somehow, my mind has begun to understand that tithing isn't the best investment.
Why not help the poor? Why spend so much money on an already-rich church that has so many big problems?
Besides, if I'm poor and in debt, why should I give my money to a church that's hugely rich, while I struggle to live and pay debts?
I'm not in love with mormonism, but I do respect and remember some of the seemingly wise and miraculous qualities about it. My practise in mentalism, in fact, could be said to be rooted in my previous LDS belief structure, you know?
As for my video game project, I'm making progress. I spend hours each day - on days where I have nothing else to do I spend several hours at a time sitting at the computer, writing code, debugging, and trying to solve problems.
So far, all problems in my work thus far have been solved, and tomorrow I plan on going into the next phase of building my project. (what I mean is, I've got working code that works as it's supposed to, all problems thus far are fixed, therefore I can move on to code more parts of the game, consequently having to fix the problems that emerge from my largely inexperienced creativity --- it's a process that consumes my days).